When you have a small dick, it's really hard to behave as though you don't. Regardless of what you may know to be the case, you'll always fall back to defending your tiny tallywhacker. He's just this in a mildly-covered-for-America athletic endeavor.
ETA: And let's all be honest. If there's ever been a cracker who looked like he had a tiny dick, Marsch is that fucking cracker.