Thanks Gotham, I didn't intended to solicit such detailed advice but I appreciate it all the same. No fever as of yet, thankfully, and it may just be a bad cold with chest congestion (let's hope). I have a mother who is a NP and a friend who is an internist—both are also chastising me heavily right now.
Getting sick on your birthday—especially in a way that can't easily be hidden on the phone/FaceTime—opens you up to all sorts of well-meaning "why aren't you taking better care of yourself" questions. And that's directed at a man that normally walks or runs (commuting to work or playing football) 40-50 miles a week, considers and logs nearly every calorie and nutrient he puts in his body, obstains from most pharmaceuticals, and (despite early comments) drinks in moderation.
All of that said, I am currently using my iPhone to reply from the shower whilst sipping steeped ginger and chamomile tea (with honey), and listening to the dulcet tones of the Lumineers. That'll be followed with a nice lie down under a NYCFC fleece blanket with Narcos on in the background (I'm told that is the best show for a recovery binge).
Roll on Sunday.
Oh, and
Midas Mulligan, I think this my be my best (and only) non-topical derailing of a thread ever.