Scouse Rants: American Football

CP_Scouse

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Mar 27, 2014
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im just gonna go out and say this, i dont like amrcian football. i think its too long, boring and pointless.
Expressing these views to my friends can result in injury (half joking).
  • Not much skill goes into American football. i mean think about it: if your strong*, you block. If you're able to throw, you throw. if you can kick, you kick. (*most of the time strong means big bonned)

  • Its slow a.f. The whole game stops because someone fell down with a ball. and somehow, magically, they make 10:00 on a game clock last 1 hour+ in real time. plus you have all the commercial breaks, and half time shows.

  • too many players on the field. i watched the jets vs giants game on christmas eve 2 years ago and i couldnt see shit. all the players were bunched up in the middle and because they're all crouching, i cant see who's who.

  • over exaggerated igos. in my school, all the football players think they're big and tough for the soul reason they play football. they work out (practice, weight lifting etc.) all year round just for 8 games (which they lost both this year and last. yes, 8 losses)


thinking about making Scouse Rants a weekly thing, let me know what you guys think
 
The two things which amuse me about American Football are these:

1 - that there are players on the pitch whose primary purpose is to block other players, and that these players are not allowed to touch the ball.

2 - that you can make a successful and even lucrative career out of being a kicking specialist, brought onto the pitch to kick the ball once and then pretty much immediately leaving the field again. Imagine if football (the real one ;) had penalty specialists, whose only purpose in the squad was to take penalties when they were awarded.

Those are two concepts I just can't get to grips with. They amuse and confuse me in equal measures.
 
Falastur Falastur It's actually a field, not a pitch.



*That's not a joke at your expense, but for the "real fans" in America, who don't realize pitch just means field in British lingo. There's also the cricket pitch, and probably field hockey pitch... But no. American "true fans" have decided you're not a good enough fan if you say field. LOL.

CP_Scouse CP_Scouse Do you go to a catholic school in Queens or public school?
 
Bring it on!

I'm with you. Never could get into football and I come from your typical Sunday Football family. I still get into (lighthearted) arguments with my dad while watching games.

I think that's the attraction for most fans; it's more about the Sunday ritual. Dad and the boys watch the game, sis complains, mom makes dinner. When I think of football, I picture my dad watching the Vikings never win, screaming every mismatched pairing of expletives you could imagine. He once called Warren Moon a 'dick flapping shitbird'. It was hilarious. Imagine how pissed you have to be that the English language doesn't even have the words available to properly reflect your disdain?

Sorry about the tangent. Yeah, NFL stinks, but I respect and mildly enjoy the American tradition of Football.
 
Falastur Falastur It's actually a field, not a pitch.



*That's not a joke at your expense, but for the "real fans" in America, who don't realize pitch just means field in British lingo. There's also the cricket pitch, and probably field hockey pitch... But no. American "true fans" have decided you're not a good enough fan if you say field. LOL.

Yeah, I was aware of that but I completely forgot it when I was typing.

That said, as a Brit with no interest in American Handegg, I'm not too fussed if I'm declared "not a good enough fan" ;)
 
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